Playdates and Alcohol

We have been known to get together with some friends here and there and have a few drinks on the weekends. There's always a responsible person who's staying sober (or only having a drink or two) in case Jude wakes up. Typically it's me and typically I will only sip on a beverage because I'd rather nurse him back to sleep than having to prepare a bottle. I personally think this is fine.

Obviously if the two of us were getting wasted at dinner and driving home with Jude in the backseat, or being so irresponsible that we have no idea what's going on, it'd be a different story.

I recently came across an article in my Parents (yes, I get that magazine. no, I did not order it myself. yes, I enjoy flipping through it) magazine about this very issues and it really got me wondering.

Basically in the article it discusses how more and more mothers are "raising a glass to parenting". It mentions how mothers are having a glass or two of wine and driving home from play dates with kids in tow. Likewise, parents are getting sloshed after their children go to bed, thinking that just because they're asleep, they're fine. Finally it added at the end that the safest route is to "get a babysitter - it's more fun for everyone".

All of this made me think. How much is too much? Is having a glass of wine (a beer, a margarita, whatever) OK if you know you'll be driving your son or daughter home? What about while you're out to dinner? Is it irresponsible for both parents to have a drink with dinner? What image does this pose to older children who are aware it's going on? Perhaps having a drink or two encourages responsible drinking as opposed to binge drinking? Doesn't getting a babysitter present the same problems as drinking after the child is asleep? I mean she'll eventually be going home...

Then there's the issue of drinking while pregnant or breastfeeding? Is one ok and not the other? I have lots of people who say to me "well, you can't drink because you're BFing right"? As if it gets in your milk and it never comes out. Personally I feel one drink is fine and I've done it a good handful of times. If Jude's out for the night and I know I won't be feeding him any more, I may put back a couple (and if he wakes up giving him a bottle). And then there's pregnancy - women used to drink all the time while they were pregnant - I believe it was more recently that they really started to advocate NOT drinking (or eating lunch meat, etc). I personally didn't drink during pregnancy (that's a lie - I had a little bit of Ryan's glass of wine while we were on vacation) - but I don't think I'd look down on someone who's having a few sips of beer, a glass of wine or a shot (kidding about the shot!) every now and then. In fact (and I say this now, but who knows what I'd actually do) I think I'd be more comfortable the second time around having a glass of wine with dinner.

It was just a really interesting topic that has this fine undetermined line somewhere. It's the line that you as a parent need to draw and hope you're right.

At the time this picture was taken, Ryan was drinking. You can already see how he's neglecting our son...

I'd love to hear what other people have to say on the topic...