Question: as far as I can tell you've always been fairly modest (maybe not the best word) when it comes to nursing your child in front of others. You rarely do it in the prescence of other people, and when you do, it's people you are close friends with, and you always use a nursing wrap or pillows to baracade/cover yourself. Now that you've been breastfeeding for 6+ months and have it DOWN, do you find yourself caring less about who is around and/or if you're covered??
I can remember how things changed for me over the course of 11 months, so I was wondering....
Answer:
In the beginning, I think I was worried about BFing Jude in front of others because I was uncomfortable with it. I didn't want people to see my tatas. Plus, getting the hang of things encouraged me to do it alone so we could focus. I could fully expose myself and not have to worry about pulling my shirt up 'just' enough, etc.
Over time, my reasons for not doing it in public have changed a little. I still don't want to whip it all out, but I've gotten much better about doing it without being too obvious. For example, I did it today on the couch in the ladies' room at Macy's. People were coming in and out - whatever. I was mildly uncomfortable, but mostly because the lobby area in the women's room was visible to pretty much anyone going in and out of the men's/women's room. At this time I did NOT have my wrap on. I I kept thinking as different women came in "oh that woman is judging me" or "they look like they probably breastfed their babies... they get it". I'm not sure what made me go one way or the other with different people, but that's what kept thinking about the whole time
A few times I've done it while at a "babywearing" class at the birth center and did it with out a wrap or anything. When I'm at my grandparents, I always go into their formal living room and anyone who's comfortable enough with it will come in and out of the room, others stay out. I specifically will cover up or go upstairs when friends come over, because most of them (the guys) have pretty much outright said it's strange to them - of course they'd never tell me not to do it, but on the rare occasion I've just covered myself, they get a little fidgety. You get the picture.
Mostly, if I go into another room, go out to my car, or at the very least cover up, it's for the sake of others. Even if it doesn't make me uncomfortable doing it in public, I don't want others to feel uncomfortable. I mean I get the whole thing that it's natural, we have rights, etc. etc. But still. I know there are people who don't feel comfortable for one reason or another (mostly because we as a country have become so prude) and I really don't mind . So I usually find a nice place to sit or rest. Not that I really care what people think, but I don't want to be 'that girl' on the mall bench.
Plus, in addition to all of that, Jude is easily distracted anymore. If he's eating when Ryan walks in the door, he stops and looks around and laughs. If I'm at my grandparents and I'm feeding him in the upstairs living room, typically someone is talking to me from the other room and he just starts and stops. If we happen to have the TV on, he's peaking back and forth at it. It's frustrating. So, it's nice to just find a nice quiet place for him fill him up and move on.
It is amazing how much more comfortable I am now than I used to be, but I haven't lost my... 'respect?' (maybe not the right word) for other people who just really seem skiddish about any sort of exposure.
Question: To anyone who doesn't/didn't breast feed: do you think it's "inappropriate" for women to do it in public? with or without a wrap, etc?
11.28.2009
Hanging out with my .... boobs out
Courtesy of Alicia Kennedy @ 1:37 PM
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3 comments:
Thanks for this post. I have only been breastfeeding for 7 weeks now and I have not been many places, but I still feel really weird about doing it in front of anyone besides my boyfriend or Mom. I went to the mall the first time this weekend and I made sure I brought a bottle. We are still working on it, but I think even as we get better at it, we will still keep in private, for others sake as you stated.
I'm assuming for anyone, it just gets more comfortable with time... the more comfortable you are with it, the easier it is to do it in more public type places.
I know it's not always convenient, but at first if I was out and about with Jude, I would always take him out to the car. I have a Liberty and my rear windows are tinted, so it was like out own little place.
Now, I'll use dressing rooms, bathrooms, whatever's around me. I know I've used the dressing room in motherhood maternity more than once, they're very good about letting you take up space for awhile to feed.
good luck!
things changed so much from the time trent was first born to the time we quit that i foresee things being soooo different for me the second time around.
I mean, i wouldn't even feed trent using a cover with MY OWN MOTHER in the same room.
(can u tell im bored. it's COMMENT TIME!)
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