Part 5: Getting Things Recreational Again

I have been putting off this post... but I guess I'll get it over with since it will fully conclude my series.

I was done working full time roughly at the beginning of September. It's now January. I think it's safe to say that my previous assumption that it'd get normal once I was home was not an accurate assumption.

I'd say the last month has really been the real transition back to normal. I personally think it's pathetic that it took basically 7 months to get any real sex drive back, but I really have no idea what the 'norm' is - some women I've talked to were back at it within a couple of weeks, some I've read about were out of it for a year. I'm not really sure at which point I went from hyperventilating at the thought of sex, to almost enjoying it, to being able to experiment with different positions again, but it happened.

That's not to say it's always a good thing! Ryan's well aware that things are back up and running and he is thrilled! Quite regularly I'm being seduced when all I want to do it sit down, relax, sleep, take advantage of my adult time and read, or just cook dinner.

My advice is if you hear about people practically wanting to beg their doctors to let them have sex again and wonder "am I weird for still not wanting to be touched after 5, 6, 7 months" - no, you're not. I personally think it's really important for you to communicate this with your husband. I know I did and there were STILL times he thought it was his fault that I couldn't get into it. Also, make a point to take the time for each other. I'm not saying you need to go out on a date or have a candle lit dinner or anything, but at night, when the baby is asleep, turn off the TV, cuddle, chat and just enjoy one another. Since I work in the evenings and Ryan during the day, it's sometimes hard to really do this, but we do try.

It's important for you to remind yourself why you're together. Not for the kid, not for the house, but because you love one another, Keep in touch with what it is that you enjoy about the other... then of course... don't forget the lube.