How Long is Too Long?

Question: I was wondering since Jude is/almost is one are you going to continue to bf? if so for how long?

Answer: This is a Question I struggle with myself. Jude turned 1 last week and obviously I'm not going to flip some switch and BAM he'll be done right away. These kinds of things generally take a little time.

Part of me is totally ready to stop breast feeding right now. I've given it a year which is a lot more than some people would ever have done. I'd like the freedom to not feel like I need to come home on lunch breaks for a feeding (I never feel like I 'have' to, but just that it'd make life easier if I did). I'd like the freedom to drink something with a little alcohol without wondering "am I going to have to feed Jude soon?", I'm considering getting a tattoo, want to give blood, I want normal bras, I want to wear a dress without wondering "how can I nurse comfortably?... and although I'm not ready for a night away from Jude, without breastfeeding, the option is there.

I failed to mention that at Jude's most recent check up, I was heavily encouraged to discontinue nursing. Basically, the doctor said he recommends making the switch to cow's milk at one year because it allows Jude to get the vitamin D he needs that breast milk does not provide (in short: he thinks it's healthier to switch now). He also said that nursing beyond one year has no real 'nutritional value', but instead is more of a security for the child. In my opinion, Jude spends more than enough time outside, so vitamin D is the least of my worries.

Knowing that WHO and LLL and a number of other groups would advocate at least 2 years, I did a little research. I've come to the conclusion that for the most part he is correct. A lot of information for nursing past the first year really indicates that the benefit is the bond for mother and baby. There is a lot of information that discusses the soothing affects on mother from the hormones released during nursing (which apparently helps with patience and loving a crazy kid running around). There's information about the positive feeling a child gets from having a 'base' to lean on after he's done exploring the world around him - which can make him more independent. There's a lot of talk about how comforting it is for an upset child... etc.

I totally get it all. I know when I walk in from work, the second Jude sees me his face lights up. He'll stop what he's doing, come crawling over to me, and reach for me to pick him up. The second he's in my arms, the thumb goes in his mouth and his hand goes down my shirt. It is perfectly clear that my breasts ARE his comfort spot. It's perfectly clear that although he's totally happy exploring the world around him, there's nothing quite like mommy's arms.

However, a lot of information also indicates that nursing beyond the first year continues to reduce the chance of cancer (in bother mother and child), continues to give your child natural antibodies and all around provides for a healthier toddler. Some information mentioned that in many cases a sick baby will nurse when rejecting all other food.

All of this information still has not given me a solid end date. I've made it to one year and from here it's a day-by-day process (really the whole thing has been pretty day by day). There are days when I tell myself 'that's it!'. Jude will skip one usual nursing time without a problem and I decide that from that day on I will not nurse him between breakfast and lunch... or before bed... or whatever the case may be that particular day. But alas, we wake up the next morning, Jude will be especially cuddly and who am I to deny such a beautiful baby boy what he wants most?

It's safe to say that I will be done nursing Jude by the time he's two... but at what point between now and then... I'm just not sure.

My Diaper System

Question:
In reference to THIS
Do you have a cute way of storing your cloth diapers?

Answer:
As you'll read in that post the lady mentions that she had a system... but it got a little more lax over time. That's pretty much how it happened for me.

When I was first doing my research on diapers, I came across something that stressed how important it was to rotate regularly through your diapers. So, when I was laying out Jude's nursery, I decided to set up a system to make it easy to do this. We do not have a changing table, but instead used the top of his dresser as his changing station. So, the top drawer to the dresser was all of his changing supplies.

After washing his diapers, I would line them up nicely in his dresser drawer with the most recently clean diapers in the back so that we would use them all an equal number of times.

Over time I needed the top drawer for one thing or another and moved them into the side cabinet on the dresser. There is a convenient little shelf that I have a red canvas tote on. I would then line the diapers up in the tote regularly circulating through them.

Eventually I realized that, unlike some mothers, I didn't have a surplus of cloth diapers. The need to rotate was apparently for those women who had more money than they knew what to do with and so they bought a bajillion cloth diapers. I had just enough for 2 days and so I really didn't need to fret about equal usage. There are some families out there with more cloth diapers than I'd know what to do with. They have different sizes, styles, etc. We don't. We have 15 Bum Genius 3.0 pocket diapers. Period. There's no reason to worry about circulating. By the time the dirty diapers get through the wash and back into Jude's room, what was put away had already been used.

So, our current system consists of me pulling them out of the dryer, tossing them into the red canvas tote and putting them together as we use them. Sometimes... if I'm feeling really fancy, we'll go through a whole load of diapers straight from the dryer.

Short Answer: no.

To work... or not to work...

Question: if you didn't have to work (financially), would you quit? or continue to work?

Answer:

I see this question in 2 ways:

1. "if Ryan made so much money you didn't know what to do with it all, would you work?": No. If I could easily not work and still have all the things in life I want, like traveling, a finished house and an unlimited wardrobe, then no, I would not be working.

2. "if Ryan made enough money for you to pay all your bills and just get by, would you work?": Yes. I would work so that we could have the extra things in life mentioned above. I'll admit that I wouldn't care to work too much, but it'd be nice to have the money to play around with.

I sometimes thought I'd go crazy not working, that it's something I felt like I had to do... but not so much anymore. I think that the thing that bothers me most is being stuck int he house all day. If I have the option to go out and do something - anything, it instantly makes staying home easier.

ME, ME, ME

Question: do you feel you get enough Alicia time? enough adult time? enough couple time?

Answer:

Hmm... oh my. I don't think I regularly get enough of any of the above. But, I think I take the blame for that for the most part.

1. Alicia Time: I do not get a lot of Alicia time. For the most part, Alicia time is the time after I get off work (or on nights I don't work: when Ryan falls asleep on the couch) and the boys are asleep. Lately I've been working on my quilt, or I'll read, maybe browse online. There have been a few times I go to a late night movie, etc. Do I think that taking the time after everyone else has fallen asleep for myself counts as "Alicia Time"? Not really... but it gives me that extra bit of sanity.

Ryan wouldn't have a problem with me going out or doing something on my own, but during the time when I'm working a lot (which is not always the case), I like to spend as much time at home with Ryan and Jude.

Finally, I really try to avoid pumping at all costs. It's just not something I enjoy doing. I'd like to say that after 9 months I'm finally over the fear of drying up after one missed feeding, but truth is, I get all paranoid. So, I try to not be away from Jude for long periods of time.

2. Adult Time: I get very little adult time during the week/weekdays. I know very few mothers that stay home, so spend the whole day with Jude. There are days that I meet my brother and his fiance for lunch or we'll go shopping or just hang out. This is always a nice change of pace.

I recently started to frequently visit a Delaware Mom's page and I have been trying to put together a play group for people in my area. This was within the last couple of weeks and I have had a few people seem interested. (I'm sure I'll blog more if/when it happens and what we do). If it happens, it should be a nice break to the week.

Other than the time during the day, we have friends over regularly to hang out in the evenings and so, to some degree... I'm getting enough adult time. but, really, Jude is pretty much always there. Whether he's hanging out with us, or asleep upstairs.

3. Couple Time: We really do not get enough couple time at all. Usually when faced with the decision to either go out alone and get a baby sitter or bring Jude with us, I/we chose to bring Jude with us. We frequently make the decision to do something at the last minute, so I'd feel bad calling someone the day of. Plus, there are a lot of things I want Jude to experience. That's not to say every time we go out for dinner, I want Jude there, but it does mean I want him there for the things we don't do regularly.

Just recently we went out for a date night and it was very nice though. It really will be nice to do more and more as Jude becomes more independent and as I stop freaking out about my boobs. I'm pretty sure his Uncle Bryan is looking forward to sleep overs!

Feedings: Frequency and Recent Changes

Question: How often do you BF Jude? Brooklyn is 3 months and I feel like I am still BF every 2-3 hours.

Answer: I will (as always) indulge and answer this in more detail than I need to:

When Jude was in the 1-2 month range he ate roughly every 2-3 hours for about 20 minutes. I usually fed him on one side for about 15 minutes and then flipped and offered him the other side (but he rarely took it). At first we were heavy on the every 2 hour side because of jaundice and then backed off. Feedings felt VERY frequent and that's probably because we were basically forcing him to eat. As they say, the first so many minutes is the thirst quencher and then behind that is the 'fatty' milk. I'll also add - this was every 2-3 hours during the day and less at much less (if at all) during the night.

When I went back to work, he ate much less during the day. I made it clear to the lovely lady watching Jude that he only NEEDED to eat when he showed hunger signs. Within an 8-9 hour period of time, he would sometimes only take like 2 bottles. She said sometimes she would think he was hungry, go to prepare a bottle and he'd fall asleep instead. Since I was pumping, this is A. OK with me. That just meant that there was less of a demand on me. He was still growing like a champ and sleeping well, so we were fine.

After I started staying home, he began eating MUCH more frequently than he was with Katie. I will attribute this to "out of sight, out of mind". With Katie, the milk wasn't constantly in his face, so he didn't feel the need to go for it. But when I'm home, he knows it's there. I can go all day without eating if I'm busy, but if I'm at a party and there's food set out, I'll pick and eat all day if I can - so will he. While he still seemed to be eating roughly every 2 hours though, the feedings were considerably shorter. They say at some point, your baby will de-latch (not the right term I'm sure) on their own. Jude on the other hand: not at all. If I let him suck all day, my man would SUCK ALL DAY! However, I did notice over time that after a certain period of time, he would slow down. Often times he'd take a few second break in between sucks. Or, more common than that, he'd fall asleep. I would not wait for him to take himself off, I'd do it for him. He never cried or fussed for more (and still continued to grow), so this is what worked for us.

Eventually he found his thumb. Once he found his thumb, I would take him off and in his thumb would go. Which reconfirmed, he just wanted to suck. He liked to suck so much, that my mother in law watched him once and he ate DOUBLE what he would any other time JUST because it was there (and then spit it up)

This was our routine until he was about 7+months old. He nursed roughly every 2-3 (sometimes more) hours for 15, 10, 5 minutes (decreased over time).


Current Feedings:
Jude began solids around 6 months. We were very slow with them because we were doing "Baby Led Weaning" (or at least something very close to it). I had originally heard about it when Barbie posted it on her blog awhile back and it struck me as interesting. I first started by giving him chunky purees. So, foods in mushed forms that he could handle. He had very little interest at first and even when we tried to feed him, he stuck his nose up. Because of this, we would go days at a time without offering him food. I'd some times put my fruit up to him to see if he'd take it... and sometimes he would. I remember my family would put foods in his face sometimes and see if he'd eat it. I almost got the impression that they didn't believe me when I said he just was not that into it. For this reason, he was still BFing every 2-3 hours

Once he really started to get the idea that these foods we were putting up to him were good and interesting, then he actually started to consume some of it. I'd say this happened about a month ago. So, in Jude's case, around 7 and a half months is when he was really ready to start making the transition. Currently we offer him solids twice a day. Once around 11am and once at our dinner time. Sometimes I'll offer him his "Purely O's" (my brother would call me out if I called them Cherrios... but that's basically what they are) in between, but usually there's no reason to.

So, let's assume Jude has a good sleep night. He'll nurse at around 5,7 and when he wakes up for good around 8:30 or 9:00 (sometimes the 7 o'clock feeding doesn't happen... sometimes the 5 o'clock doesn't... etc). On a pretty normal day by 10:30 or 11:00 we have showered, dressed, done some cleaning or started our errands. I rarely eat breakfast, so this is 'lunch' time and also when I present Jude with his first solid.

Not too long after is nap time. Sometimes I'll nurse him to sleep, or on very rare occasions he'll go to sleep by being rocked, in my arms, in his carrier, etc. So, maybe a nursing at nap time (12:30?) and then maybe 2 more before dinner which is when he gets offered solids a second time. Finally, I'll either nurse him before bed or Ryan will give him a bottle if I'm working (very rarely, he will fall asleep at night without his last bottle - but it has happened).

He appears to still be an every 2-3 hour eater.... but now that we have solids it's breaking up the nursing a bit.

I hope that helped... basically, I would say that what really helped is when the feedings got shorter. I was not nursing for 20 minutes at a time, so when my 2-3 hours were up, I did not feel like I had JUST finished feeding him.

Have I mentioned how much I love this kid???

In other food news:
- Jude has successfully eaten a few 'whole' bananas. Not only has he eaten the whole thing at once, but he eats it the way a grown person would eat a banana. It has got to be one of the cutest things. Ever. On the rare occasion that we're in the middle of doing some when Jude should be presented with his solids (and I feel bad substituting that meal with breast milk), the banana has become the most convenient 'on the go' meal. I hold it, he bites.

- Tonight, we gave Jude his first piece of meat. Apparently we're at the age when meat and dairy can began to be introduced. We went to Buffalo Wild Wings for 'cheap' wing night and I got chicken fingers. The service was pretty rough and we were through all of Jude's purely O's (and banana) before our food arrived. Being that we were approaching his bed time he was a little fussy, so we let him play with a piece of the chicken finger (without the crunchy outside). I didn't like the idea of fried meat for him... but what can you do? He ate a couple of small pieces and seemed to like it. I was really hesitant to start meat and dairy, but... what can you do? Perhaps in the next couple of days I'll make some more wholesome chicken and really let him try it.

My Bum Genius Baby

Question: Do you find that your one-size bum genius diapers are adjusting well to your ever-growing son? How many did you start out with? Have any been ruined and if so, how were they ruined? How are they holding up overall?

Answer:

I started with 15. At first, I'd say this was enough for 1.5 days. Now, we get more like 2.5 days. I was very hesitant at first to buy all of one brand since I had no experience with them, but I just jumped into it. I remember I considered a couple of other brands and almost bought 1/2 Bum Genius and 1/2 of another brand. However, I remember that every chat board I went on, at least one mother was raving about how much she loved her BG's, so I just went for it.

They are adjusting well to my growing baby. There are three size options with these one-size-fits-all diapers. The small, medium and large sizes can be achieved with a series of snaps. I believe that they fit babies from 7-35 pounds. I know it seemed like we zipped through the first two sizes and got to the largest setting very quickly. I remember being really concerned and thinking we had invested all this money into diapers that were supposed to last forever and here we were less than a year in, and on the last setting.

Then I did some research. Mothers on chat boards said they had the same fears. Some said they even adjusted up to the largest setting and as their little one changed shape, they had to adjust back down to a smaller size. I still wasn't 100% convinced. Then, I found that Pampers wasn't too far off from this. Their size 3 covers 14-22 pounds and their size 4 is 22-37 pounds. If the leader in disposable diapers can cover 15 pounds with one size, I felt confident that BG could too.

Plus, they have an elastic-type back and elastic around the legs. In addition, the velcro version of the diaper has a strip of velcro all the way across the front and velcro tabs. So, you can make it as tight or as loose as you need to. All of this can be summed up by saying: every part of the diaper is adjustable - whether with elastic, snaps or velcro. Sometimes I currently look at them and consider going down a size to see how they fit. They sometimes look a little lose around the leg, but so far we haven't had any problems, so I haven't really had a reason to do it.


At roughly $17.99 a diaper I would be very upset if any of them were ruined. I remember when I got my 'instructions' from the company on how to care for them and was VERY overwhelmed! However, knowing these were the diapers that would hopefully get me through until my son was in underoos, I read it and paid extra attention to the wash instructions.

Basic Care:
- wash a few times before you start to use them (you know when you get a new towel how it doesn't absorb that well? same thing with these, it takes a couple of washes to get them to absorb well - and after a few more, they absorb like a champ)
-wash frequently - don't let the diapers sit more than two days (the urine and poo can harm the fabrics if they sit too long, too often)
- don't store in a sealed container (for same reason as above - it's best to let them breathe)
- use 1/4 of the amount of laundry detergent you usually would (the loads are much smaller, so there's no need for massive amounts of detergent. Plus, a build up of detergent can cause them to start to stink. If you an HE washer and dryer owner, this is especially important b/c your machine will be using considerably less water)
- wash on a double rinse cycle (this helps in getting excess detergent out)
- if they DO start to stink, you can put them in on a rinse cycle without detergent or lay/hang them out in the sun to get them back to normal (I have never had to do either of these although I've considered doing it for precautionary measures this spring when it gets nice out)
- always fasten the laundry tabs (this keeps the laundry tabs extra velcro-y, which keeps them on your baby's bottom)




I follow the instructions and by doing so, have not had any problems with them. I have however heard the most common problems are that they start to smell (even after they've been washed) and the velcro runs out of stick. After reading BG's web page it seems this is the result of people not caring for them properly. FOLLOW THE INSTRUCTIONS

In addition, I spoke with a mother who said half way through baby number two her velcro was loosing some stick. She contacted the company and they sent her new velcro. After she stitched it on, they were as good as new.

I am not at all an expert on cloth diapers. I have never tried anything other than bum genius, but either way, I still say they are great. I'm sure there are others out there that are just as great and maybe others like them more, but my baby is without a doubt a bum genius baby.

Diaper Free Progress II

Question: are you still EC'ing? If so, how's that going?

Answer: I think the safest and most honest answer would be no. I do not track his pees, I don't time him, look for cues or go extended periods of time without a diaper on him.

If he's having some naked time, then I will plop him on the potty to see if there's anything happening. If I have him ready for a bath or something, I'll plop him on the toilet to see if he's got anything going on. But that's about it.

I really think if it were warmer out, I would have been much more successful. I wouldn't have felt as bad about having Jude hang around in nothing but a t-shirt all the time and I might have been a little more inclined to try ECing outside of the home. But really, taking off all his layers just to find that he's already peed in his diaper is a real hassle. Our time at home always went pretty well. I had his timing pretty down and it worked well for us, but of course the 'misses' sucked. I'd have to spot clean the rug and that just got old. Towards the end I just felt like I was raising a puppy again.

I think that we were so successful at first because I wanted it to work! I was all into it in the beginning and so I was on top of him all the time to make it work. But slowly it lost it's luster.

Then in addition to wet diapers, there are dirty diapers. Jude was never a really constant pooper and when he did release, I think he may have been mildly constipated. Recently though he's come out of that a bit and seems to be going the same time every day (at like 7:00 in the morning - ugh). If he continues with his regular poos, I might try to make a regular potty trip out of it. I really don't know...

All of that being said, I am considering trying to potty train him at one. Again, this will all depend on how he accepts it, but it's another thing that has struck me as a possibility. But really, we're in no huge rush to get him out of diapers. There's no cost (aside from the laundry) for us having Jude in diapers, so it's not like we need to rush through the diaper phase to save a bundle of money. But of course - not washing diapers is a very nice thought.

Donating?

Question: i read a few other 101 lists and saw that some people donate $x for each item that do not complete in 1001 days.

Will you do anything special for the items you don't complete? Or do you simply plan to complete them all, no matter what?

Answer: I currently have no plans to donate for each item not completed. I have no real reward in place for finishing and I have no punishment in place for not finishing items. While I would LOVE to finish each item, I'm sure there will be things that don't get completed.

Really though, I see the list as something to keep me focused on my goals and perhaps I could look at it in the end and be proud of what progress I have made instead of punishing myself for what I didn't do.

I feel like I repeated myself. But you get the point.

Maybe when I'm another year in, with only 3/4 of a year to go for my original list I'll think of some way to acknowledge what wasn't finished.

Still Breastfeeding at 7.5 Months...

Question: now that jude is "getting older" have you gotten any comments/questions from people about your "still" breastfeeding him?
positive or negative

Answer: I remember when I first made the decision to breastfeed, I said I'd try it and if I was successful, I'd BF until I went back to work. My family all seemed to have problems with it, so i thought if there was some genetic component, I'd surely have it. Well BFing fit me well, so then I decided I'd try pumping at work. I figured if anything I'd get to around 6 months before it would get weird and I'd consider quiting (that's when they start to crawl and really communicate - BFing at that age just HAD to be weird). Ryan on the other hand totally supported me BFing as long as I had to, to totally skip formula all together (this is because he's cheap, not because he's a male advocate for BFing - although he appreciates the health benefits).

I'll share a few stories:

1. A few days ago I was at my grandparents. I was laying on the floor and Jude was crawling around playing. He instantly got a little cranky and that meant he was hungry. Well, with my grandparents sitting there, he crawls over to me, puts his head in my chest and opens wide. It was quite obvious what he was after. My grandmother chuckled and said "well, we all know what he wants!". I politely left the room and fed him.

2. Today, I was getting out of the shower, Jude saw me and instantly starting reaching for me/whining a little. I picked him up (I was still bare chested as I had literally JUST gotten out of the shower) and he stops crying. Then he grabbed my nipple and tried to pull my big old saggy breasts into his mouth.

3. Quite regularly, I'll be holding Jude and he will shove his hand down the collar of my shirt and just hang out with my cleavage. He will try to "pet" me and nuzzle his little head into the most natural pillows he knows.

I wasn't quite sure I'd be down for all that. The thought of Jude actively going after his breakfast/lunch/dinner was just a bit much for me. However, as he is getting more and more mobile and he is in fact going after his food source, I'm not really that embarrassed? freak out? grossed out? by it as I thought I would be. Perhaps because it all happens so gradually? Perhaps because I just love his kid so much that he could murder someone and all I'd have to say is how adorable he looks with a kitchen knife? Perhaps because I know that even if I switched to formula, out of habit, he's still signal to me he wanted food by reaching for my breasts? Who knows.

Even with his angry man face on he's adorable...

Sure, when he's got his hand down my shirt people chuckle and say things like "must be hungry" or "typical male" or "like father, like son", but I've yet to get any real negative (or positive) comments about how long he's been breast fed. This surprises me because I can distinctly remember people commenting about how when babies get too old it's just weird. But I guess those comments are for the two year olds who can walk up and say "milk please" and not for the baby who simply grabs at what he loves the most.

Occasionally I'll have someone tell me how great it is that I breastfed at all and how good it is for the baby or how if they knew the benefits when their kids were young they would have done it. In addition, I always hear about how HAPPY Jude is and that it must be because he's breastfed and how good it is for his belly. Then there are the times when old women feel the need to justify and say "my children thrived just fine on corn syrup and evaporated milk" - or whatever the combination was. But besides that, I never get any comments directly related to Jude's age.

I wonder if people were making comments that it'd make me feel uncomfortable or if I might try giving him more solids to avoid always going right to breast milk? I'm really not sure how I would respond... but either way, I'm glad they mind their own business :)

Question: When do YOU think is an appropriate time to stop breast feeding, regardless of what is recommended by any organization? This isn't to say when you personally would, but when do you think they're just "too old"?

MMM Dessert

Question: it's almost winter. do you have a dessert in mind?

Answer: This is in reference to my 101 item that is to make 4 seasonal desserts (one for each season - in one year).

I was actually just thinking about this the other day. I have a couple of ideas in mind, but mostly based on flavors that strike me as 'wintery'.

I've considered making my brother some peppermint bark. But just about anything peppermint seems wintery. Then there's cranberry and ginger too. Also, pomegranite seem pretty in-season right now. So I have a lot of options.

If I go with ginger, I'll make gingerbread men or a gingerbread house. If i go the pom. or cranberry route, then I'll have to find a recipe. For peppermint, there's a bunch of options.

Whatever I end up making I will probably be taking to my grandparents for Christmas Eve, so it will hopefully get eaten!

Question:
what is one thing you think you could do differently that would make you a better mother?

what is one thing you think Ryan could do to make himself a better father?

Answer:

Not to sound totally into myself, but the first of these questions is much more difficult. Only because being human, it's got to be easier to judge other people that it is yourself. So, I'm going to start with question #2: what could Ryan do to be a better father... and then move on to the first part.

Not telling him why I was asking, after reading the question, I asked him "what do you think you could do to be a better dad?". Immediately without thinking about it he said "you want me to get rid of the kegerator don't you?". I laughed. I'll say (before you think I have an alcoholic husband) he does not drink that much and considering how much we used to drink during the weekends... he barely touches it. If I had to pick something that I think Ryan could 'improve' on, it would be his TV consumption. A few weeks ago, we actually made a house 'rule' that we would minimize TV use until after Jude goes to bed. It's very easy for Ryan to get sucked into the box. So, he'll be laying on the floor playing with Jude or talking to me, or whatever... and only be 1/2 paying attention.

Instead, recently while cooking dinner or whatever it is that we're doing in our free time before Jude's 7:00 bed time, we'll have the radio on, or he'll be playing on the floor with his toys while we read. It's much more relaxing in my opinion. Of course, I'm sure that our 'house rule' isn't followed 100% while I'm at work... but whatever. So, as a father I think he could improve by blocking out some of his distractions and give Jude undivided attention.

Now on to me... hmmm...

I'm not sure if this is a cop-out answer, but I think I need to "let go" a little more. Aside from my two months or so back to work, I honestly can count on my hands how many times we've left Jude with a babysitter in the last 7 months (YES! HE'S SEVEN MONTHS! CRAZY! More to come on that). He is pretty much ALWAYS with me or Ryan. Period. I know it doesn't sound like a bad thing, but I know eventually (if not a little already??) one can get 'burnt out on baby'.

In addition to just not wanting to be away from him, there are a number of reasons I just don't leave him.

1. breastfeeding. This is without a doubt my number one reason when considering whether I'll leave him. I really try to avoid pumping and kinda freak myself out about missing feedings, so if I'm not working, I really don't want to skip feedings. I work my time out of the house around his feedings, thus making mommy time brief or late at night. When Ryan and I are presented with day trips or other generally baby-free events, I try to find a way to work Jude into it, because I don't want to be faced with the "to pump or not to pump" decision.

2. I really feel like I'm inconveniencing people. I hate to call people up and have them come over to watch him. Especially since Ryan and I aren't the best of 'planners' and our decision to want to hit a movie or go to an event or grab dinner or a drink are pretty last minute. So, instead of a little one on one time, we just bring the little guy along. This makes romantic dinners a little less romantic and movie far and few, but really I'm kind of OK with that.

3. and probably the most terrible reason... there are only a handful of people I trust... not because I don't want them alone with my baby, but because I want them to do things MY way. There are some people who I know will listen to my requests and try to do things the way I'd like. However, there are others who I think (or know, from experience) would basically ignore what I tell them and make their own assumptions about what is right for Jude. Considering for the most part I have a pretty clear plan for what I do or do not want Jude exposed to, leaving him with someone who will ignore my requests is very frustrating to me.

In addition, I think I could be a little better about solids with Jude. When we first started him on solids, I was very excited to experiment with foods. Even to this day, he's just not really into them. They are presented to him, he plays with them, I feed him a little and he just doesn't indulge, I'm lucky if he takes a bite or two or anything. As a result, I almost see it as a waste and go a few days at a time without even giving him any.

I'm sure there are a million other things that I could improve upon, but I'd say these are two things that I personally consider some of my biggest 'issues'.

Question: to the other mothers: what things do you think you could improve upon?

Hanging out with my .... boobs out

Question: as far as I can tell you've always been fairly modest (maybe not the best word) when it comes to nursing your child in front of others. You rarely do it in the prescence of other people, and when you do, it's people you are close friends with, and you always use a nursing wrap or pillows to baracade/cover yourself. Now that you've been breastfeeding for 6+ months and have it DOWN, do you find yourself caring less about who is around and/or if you're covered??

I can remember how things changed for me over the course of 11 months, so I was wondering....

Answer:
In the beginning, I think I was worried about BFing Jude in front of others because I was uncomfortable with it. I didn't want people to see my tatas. Plus, getting the hang of things encouraged me to do it alone so we could focus. I could fully expose myself and not have to worry about pulling my shirt up 'just' enough, etc.

Over time, my reasons for not doing it in public have changed a little. I still don't want to whip it all out, but I've gotten much better about doing it without being too obvious. For example, I did it today on the couch in the ladies' room at Macy's. People were coming in and out - whatever. I was mildly uncomfortable, but mostly because the lobby area in the women's room was visible to pretty much anyone going in and out of the men's/women's room. At this time I did NOT have my wrap on. I I kept thinking as different women came in "oh that woman is judging me" or "they look like they probably breastfed their babies... they get it". I'm not sure what made me go one way or the other with different people, but that's what kept thinking about the whole time

A few times I've done it while at a "babywearing" class at the birth center and did it with out a wrap or anything. When I'm at my grandparents, I always go into their formal living room and anyone who's comfortable enough with it will come in and out of the room, others stay out. I specifically will cover up or go upstairs when friends come over, because most of them (the guys) have pretty much outright said it's strange to them - of course they'd never tell me not to do it, but on the rare occasion I've just covered myself, they get a little fidgety. You get the picture.

Mostly, if I go into another room, go out to my car, or at the very least cover up, it's for the sake of others. Even if it doesn't make me uncomfortable doing it in public, I don't want others to feel uncomfortable. I mean I get the whole thing that it's natural, we have rights, etc. etc. But still. I know there are people who don't feel comfortable for one reason or another (mostly because we as a country have become so prude) and I really don't mind . So I usually find a nice place to sit or rest. Not that I really care what people think, but I don't want to be 'that girl' on the mall bench.

Plus, in addition to all of that, Jude is easily distracted anymore. If he's eating when Ryan walks in the door, he stops and looks around and laughs. If I'm at my grandparents and I'm feeding him in the upstairs living room, typically someone is talking to me from the other room and he just starts and stops. If we happen to have the TV on, he's peaking back and forth at it. It's frustrating. So, it's nice to just find a nice quiet place for him fill him up and move on.

It is amazing how much more comfortable I am now than I used to be, but I haven't lost my... 'respect?' (maybe not the right word) for other people who just really seem skiddish about any sort of exposure.

Question: To anyone who doesn't/didn't breast feed: do you think it's "inappropriate" for women to do it in public? with or without a wrap, etc?

Pictures With Santa - and so much more...

Question: Do you plan to get Jude's picture taken with Santa Claus?

Answer: I honestly haven't given it much thought. If they do the dog night again, I think I'd love for Buddy and Jude to get one together. If they don't, I can imagine us never making plans to actually go and do it, but if we're at the mall one night and happen to think of it, sure.

It's funny that you ask that though as I was just having 'the santa' conversation with my brother and Katy yesterday.

Katy grew up in a house where they didn't celebrate Christmas, so they never believed in Santa. My brother (being the youngest of the three of us) said he was heart broken when he found out there was no Santa. I'll say that he might have been younger finding out than some other kids (or at least younger than me and my older brother) because in my opinion, it's one of those things you all realize together. I mean, being the evil older sister I am, I can imagine me making fun of the 4,5,10,whatever year old Bryan, for thinking there's a Santa after I find out there's not. The two of them seemed to be leaning in the direction of not telling their kids there's a Santa. (so, when your future kids come home and say "_____ Wilson told me there's no such thing as Santa, the Easter Bunny, tooth Fairy..." you'll know who to blame.)

Now up until this year, It was never a question - duh, Jude's gonna think there's a Santa! But yesterday I caught myself wondering if it's really something I want to push. My main reason for questioning myself was because of what Christmas has become to some degree. Parents who may or may not already be struggling to get by, get this three page list of toys and gadgets their child HAS to have and to the young child, it's nothing... Santa's elves make it, it's free and it gets delivered, end of story. I mean I don't want Jude to have our financial situation at the time on his shoulder's when picking out a gift, but I also hope that from a young age we instill some sense of responsibility in him making him aware that money does not grow on trees and toys can be expensive, so he can not always have everything he wants (no matter how much I want him to). I personally feel that too often parents keep their finances this huge secret and just give and give when they don't have it.

But at the same time... I want my child to be just that... a kid. Maybe not a kid with a million toys and parents with a negative bank account, but a kid with an imagination. A kid who with out a blink of an eye can picture Santa's workshop chuggin' a long up at the North Pole pumping out Nintendo Wii's, Tonka Trucks and baseball bats all hours of the day. A kid who doesn't question why elves have pointy ears and sing Christmas Carols all day long. And last but not least, I want it to make perfect sense to him that Santa can hop in a sleigh with eight reindeer (who have to be at least 100 years old now) and fly around the world in one night delivering presents to every little girl and boy with out them knowing. That it the great part about kids - their unwavering imagination. Who am I to take that away from him?

So I think I've come to the conclusion that Jude will be told there is a Santa. We will not push it on him like my parents did (yes - in middle school, my parents still insisted I believed and would say over and over again that the presents stop coming when you stop believing) but I also won't be that mother who outright tells him this is the way it is, there is no Santa. But I will not say every gift under the tree is a Santa gift. I think we will tell Jude every year to pick one special gift that he wants from Santa and that's what we will put out after he goes to bed at night on Christmas Eve. Everything else will be from mommy and daddy and be wrapped and put under the tree a head of time.

Another option is that the gifts under the tree can be from us and we can fill his stocking with little gifts from Santa. I'm not sure. But I'm liking where this is going. I think it will make that gift all the more special.

In addition to all of the gift giving to Jude, I'd like to incorporate the idea of giving to others into every Christmas. I'd like to make it a tradition for us to take Jude out to pick out gifts to give to other kids. I think it would be a fun and rewarding thing to start doing more regularly after this year.

Question: Do you think I'm crazy? LOL

Jude's Favorites

Question: When I was breastfeeding Riley she would only drink from one boob leaving me to pump the other. does jude have a favorite boobie or does he do pretty well rotating between them?

Answer: The answer to this has fluctuated a little over the past 6-7 months.

When I first had Jude, he would do really well on the left but was not as good on the right. I never had very sore/cracked nipples and all that, but there was a little more pain associated with feeding Jude on the right when he first got started. Looking back, I think I'd associate that with the right producing more. So, at first, when my milk came in, it was probably harder for him to get a good latch.

Once he did get the hang of it, the right is without a doubt his 'favorite'. It produces way more and it seriously feels like it's always ready to go. The left produces much less and NEEDS the four hours in between to stock back up.

When I wake up, we always start on the right and then switch back and forth through the day - usually ending on the left. He takes well to both and I've never had a situation where I had to pump because he wouldn't take a side.

I do often 'joke' that the right is his 'meal' boob and the left is his 'snack' side that keeps him full between meals. I think it's amazing that he eats for equal amounts of time on both sides, but it produces significantly less. I guess though that it's regulated it's self according to Jude's needs.

Holiday's

Question:
Think you'll do professional holiday photos this year? if so, Jude only, or family?

will you be doing anything special for thanksgiving this year? or over the long thanksgiving weekend?

Answer:

Let's start with the first portion: Professional Photos. No. To this point, Jude has had professional photos when he was born and then once in passing at BRU. We pretty much had no real intentions to buy the BRU ones, but did anyway because who can resist a picture of their child?

I'm sure I'll pose him in front of the tree or set the timer on my camera to get a whole family shot, but I'm pretty certain that we will not be forking out the money for professional photos again until he's a year old - at which point it might be nice to do some professional family photos or something. By keeping the professional pictures spread out further, I hope it allows us to continue going to the studio that we have been going to for our wedding, maternity and newborn photos (Laura Novak). I'm sure if I were getting Jude's pictures done more regularly, I wouldn't even be able to consider this.

Thanksgiving is quickly approaching... my goodness. Every year, October through December always fly by so quickly for me and this year was no exception! Next week is Thanksgiving and I've hardly given it any thought.

Our usual schedule is relaxing through the early part of the day and then heading over to my grandparents for dinner and finishing up at my grandmom's (other side) for dessert. I'm thinking that this year will be no different. With my grandfather being treated for lung cancer right now, I'm sure it will be an enjoyable holiday and I'll want to spend it with them. Ryan's family typically doesn't do much of anything, but if they do, we always fit them in too.

As for the rest of the holiday weekend, I have to work :( Recently I have been getting little to no hours, but of course, I'm working the day after Thanksgiving. It's not a big deal because it's in the evening, but it's still a bit of a bummer. I haven't gotten my Saturday and Sunday schedule, but if I'm off, I'm sure we'll be tackling more projects around the house or just hanging out and enjoying each other.

This will be a change from previous years, but not because Jude is here, but because we're not buying a stack of Christmas presents. Usually I'd brave the early morning crowds with my mom (and typically not find anything worth buying) and spend the whole day shopping. I'm sure she'll try to convince me to tag along anyway (and I might) but at least I can expect to not have to fork out a bunch of money.

So, nothing too exciting is going on for Jude's first Thanksgiving, but the time spent with the family is always nice.

UPDATE:

Addition Questions:

1. will you be dressing Jude in an exceptionally nice outfit for Thanksgiving? do you already own it?

2. how about the day/night before thanksgiving - the biggest party night of the year...plans?

Additional Answers:

1. I really don't think so. I remember I used to hate having to get all dolled up for the holidays in outfits that my parents picked out for me (this is late elementary school aged me). Typically they wanted me to look nice, but didn't want to break the bank, so got some outfit that I'd be mortified if my friends saw me in it. Then of course, you wore this outfit to a family function where half the family was dressed up and the other half was in jeans and a t-shirt. Then of course all of my cousins would want to run around and have fun doing whatever it is that kids do while I'm still stuck in my dress and goofy looking dress shoes feeling miserable.

Now, Jude's not at the age for any of the above, but I still don't think we'll be putting anything special on him for Thanksgiving. Maybe a nicer pair of pants that he already has and one of his sweaters or something, but that's about it. This also applies to Christmas. If we had a daughter, I might be more inclined to buy a nice little dress or something - but nothing that I wouldn't put on her any other day - I PERSONALLY just don't see the point in spending the moeny, but that's just me and obviously there are ooddles of people who DO do it.

2. The biggest party night of the year.... I will be working. That's right, I pulled the card for day before and after thanksgiving to work. Ryan had said if I wasn't working we'd go out, but it's clear that we won't be now. It is possible however that after work we'll be hanging out around the house with a friend or two. There really are no set plans yet though.

becoming who/what I want to be

Question: I was recently updating my 101 list and was wondering if you have any news or updates on yours? I took a quick glance at your list a minute ago - and at the risk of sounding totally corny - I'd say (IMO) you can cross #1 off your list. You are so obviously meant to be a mommy. (dont let ryan see this, haha).

Answer: It's so funny that you ask this question (it wasn't really posed as a question, but I'm going to elaborate on it), because I already had this pending as a blog post. So, for the sake of answering your question, I changed my post a little and just combined the two.

For those of you who aren't sure what she's asking, here is #1 on my list of 101:
1. Start my 'career' (whatever that may be)

The other day I was thinking a little about where I am in my life. For once my days don't seem to be ticking by at some slow useless pace, I don't feel like I'm counting down the days to the next big event (a holiday, a day off, a vacation). I feel like I am trying to make the best of every moment. I sit down with Jude and truly try to enjoy our time together and I feel totally fulfilled. There really is nothing I would rather be doing right now than spending my time with him. Today, for example, we just sat and watched the rain for awhile, I played with my camera and took pictures of him exploring his toys. It was great.

We have little day trips out and about, we spend time with Uncle Bryan and Aunt Katy, we take time each morning to cuddle in bed (more to come on that), take our time getting dressed, exploring new foods and so much more. It's really great.

But I guess the real question is do I want to cross of #1? I don't think so. While for once in my life I feel like I'm doing something totally worthwhile and rewarding. I love every second, but when I'm done with being a 'stay at home' mother, I really do have high hopes to start a career and do something I love. I've had dreams of being a photographer, starting my own business, working with kids, continuing my college education in some way with a career in psychology and so much more. While being a mother is what I want right now, once Jude is in school... or I feel comfortable putting him in day care (my 'at home' time really has no set end date) I really truly hope to achieve something career-oriented. It's really a selfish goal as right now I'm giving 100% of me to my house, my husband and my son - so would eventually like to do something for me.

As for the rest of the list: I think the only item that really has had any progress was Jumping in leaves as posted previously. I do plan to in the near future skimming through to see if anything else is in progress, but I'm pretty sure there isn't anything else. I'll be sure to put up a post if I do any significant updating.

This was a gift from mom-mom, he just recently started to really get into it - he obviously doesn't put the shape in the holes, but he sure does chew on them.

My two sons...

Question: If you're a SAHM do you feel like it's a 'job'/career? Do you eventually want to get a job and contribute (more) to the income, or are you happy being at home? If you work, do you feel like being a mother is a second job?

To Snip or Not to Snip

Question:

My question is for Ryan:

With Jude's 6 month "birthday" quickly approaching, what's the latest with the circumcision? Going to go thru with it, or keep him all naturale?

Answer:

Ahh.... Jude's poor little pee pee... he's only 6 months and it's been through so much.

At the time I read this question I asked Ryan and his response: "oh man, I wanna get him circumsized, but I just keep forgetting".

Our deal was that it's totally up to Ryan what happens. Whether we put him under for a 6 month circumcision or just leave him the way he is with his little dorsal split. I said whatever his decision I would not be the one making the call to schedule it. Instead if he wanted it to happen he would make the appointment. He never made the appointment. This was fine with me because I just am not comfortable with him being put under.

Our reason to initially circumsize was based on what we saw as "normal". The following stats make me re-think it:

"federal data from 1999 showed hospital circumcision rates of 81 percent in the Midwest, 66 percent in the Northeast, 64 percent in the South and 37 percent in the West"

So - where we live, Jude has ALMOST a 50/50 chance of being like the little boy next to him in the gym shower.

This information works for me and considering the ideal time to do the circumcision is now - we will not be putting him through it later.

Sleeping - without the Co

Question: ever wish you didnt stop co-sleeping?

Answer:

When Ryan and I first started to sleep with Jude, it was not something we did for the sake of co-sleeping. It happened quite by accident.

As with any newborn, Jude would sleep best when being held close. I remember if he was having a hard time being put to sleep, I'd lay him on my chest, bring my legs up under him and wrap my arms around him. This gave him the closeness he wanted on all sides and he would fall asleep easily. So, when getting Jude to fall asleep and wanting to sleep myself, I of course would hold him in my arms to get him to sleep.

Jude always hated sleeping on his back. From day one the second you laid him on his back he would wake up. So, I would instead hold him in my arms until he fell asleep and then just fall asleep myself.

The first few times this happened I felt like a terrible mother. Doctors, nurses, anyone you talked to would tell you how BAD this was! You could roll over and suffocate your baby! Even though this option gave Ryan and I sleepful nights pretty early on, we were both a little ashamed to be doing what apparently was so "wrong". I seriously wouldn't tell anyone he slept in our bed because I didn't want to hear the same stories about people rolling over and killing their children or the kids who survived but then were sleeping in their parent's beds until they were 21.

Then one day, felling terrible that my little man was laying in bed between two full grown people I of course did what I always do: looked online. I typed in something a long the lines of "do you sleep with you baby" in google to be sure I'm not the only mother doing it and BOOM there was a million hits. It all led me to co-sleeping and that there are so many supporters of it. Ryan and I were not at all doing it because of this attached parenting style and had no plans on this being a long term thing, but it was nice to know the support was there. I had also read that it was best that if you planned to stop co-sleeping on your own terms it was best to do it before 6 months as this was the point when you child would become most aware of his/her surroundings and so if they woke up in their bed room, expecting to be in your room, they wouldn't be happy. So, we planned to try to get him transitioned by then.

As Jude got a little older, could move a little on his own and we were ready to be away from him for the night, we gave it a whirl in the crib. I'll add that because he was able to roll over, we put him on his stomach. This is another HUGE no-no in the AAP, but we did it anyway. He slept like a champ. I wanna say this decision to move him happened around the time he started to set his own bed time (maybe 3 months?? I'm not 100% sure). Typically now, we put Jude to sleep in his crib and when he wakes up in the morning, Ryan brings him in bed with me. Usually he'll wake up around 5-6am, nurses and falls back to sleep for a couple to a few more hours. This is my chance to cuddle with him. I love it. Then, when he's up for good, we have a little bit of time laying together. He 'talks' to me and bites my face - it's so sweet.

But on with the answer to the question... do I miss co-sleeping. Yes.

Of course it's so nice to only have to share my bed with two other people now (we co-sleep with Buddy) and I'm sure I'm getting a much deeper sleep than when I was aware of Jude and it allows for more random "adult" time.. (wink, wink). However, I love/loved cuddling with Jude. I love taking advantage of nap time and our morning cuddle time.

Still, I consider myself lucky that he adjusted so easily to his crib, but look for random reasons to bring him in bed with me. Typically these are bad decisions because then I'm waking up every 2 hours or so to the sound of him moving, to feed him, or just to check on him when we both could use the good nights sleep. These random in-bed decisions are getting fewer and further between, but it's still nice when it happens, no matter how often I have to wake up!

As a side note, I think that Buddy is happy we stopped co-sleeping. He obviously doesn't get as much attention now as he did before Jude and so night time is he chance to soak up all the mommy and daddy attention he can.

Professional Photos

Question: have you decide how/where/when you're going to display your professional maternity photos and Jude's newborn photos?

When do you think will be the next time you get professional photos taken?

Answer:

I'll start with the second part first, since it's probably the easiest part. I'm thinking we will not get professional pictures of Jude again until he's a year old. If not for any other reason than he's almost 5 months now and I haven't displayed his newborn photos yet! I don't want to get too far behind! If I were a parent who very rarely took pictures on my own, I imagine I would do it more often. However, I'm constantly clicking away and personally like those candid, at-home moments so much more. As we begin to finish our home more, I'd love to begin framing candids and so don't want to feel like I wasted a bundle of money on professional pictures and HAVE to display them instead.

That being said, we were at BRU about a month ago and the lady from their portrait studio INSISTED that she just had to photograph such a beautiful baby (aka she was bored and was hoping to make a little extra money), so I let her. Of course the ploy worked and I bought some of the pictures, but again, they're still in the bag. It was nice however, to have them to pass out to grandparents and Uncle Bryan.

So, on with the first part of the question.. where/how/when to display.

At the time I got the photos taken, I had no real plan for them. I knew however, that if I didn't have them done, I'd regret it. So when ordering time came I was very intimidated. What pictures should I get? Should I really splurge and order a framed/mounted picture which would cost me a lot of money or just get some prints and frame them myself?

I opted for the second option - prints. I figured this was the best way for me to go. By framing them myself I could always change out the frame depending on room decor, etc. I could change mat sizes/colors to adjust the look and separate the images throughout the house or keep them all together. It just seemed most versatile. I know the photographer really pushed a trio of 10x10 photos that were mounted without a frame and even though I really liked the way they looked, it just felt a little too modern for my house and I would have felt obligated to keep them all together for fear of recreating the same look in three different rooms. Oh - and it was more than I was looking to spend!

I imagine when I finally get Jude's newborn photos up, they will be going in our front living room. I have a rough plan for I want the finished product of that room to look like and they will fit nicely in there. I have 2 - 8x10's (horizontal) and 1 - 11x14 (vertical) that I plan to put in a row with the 11x14 in the middle. I think it will look nice over the couch we will eventually have which will be on the wall opposite the bay window in that room. His newborn photos are something I'm sure I'll always treasure and feel confident that I won't feel the need to replace them with other images for quite some time. When/if #2 comes along, I'm sure I can give him/her equal newborn photo space somewhere else in the house.

Other places I've considered putting them: in Jude's room, in the main living room or in any of the hallways.

As for my maternity photos, I have no set idea where I want to put them. I THINK I got 3 - 8x10's (maybe only two, but I think it's three) that again I can put together or split up. One of them has a picture of Ryan and I, so I won't feel uncomfortable hanging it, but the other(s) are just of me... so I'm not sure how I'd feel about it/them being all on their own. So, I can imagine them going together. I've considered them being hung in our bedroom, the upstairs hall way, up the steps, or in the main hallway when you come in the door. The option that's most appealing to me is our bedroom. For some reason, it just seems most appropriate. If they going in there, they'll replace a full length mirror that is between Ryan and I's closet and would be stack on top of each other as opposed to being hung horizontally. I've also considered them going over my bed, but decided I'd rather have some sort of metal work or something there in stead.

Home is where my heart is...

Question: What are your favorite parts of being off work during the day? Least favorite?

Answer:

When I made the leap into working part time, I was oh so excited! I still am more than thrilled that I can be home with Jude all day, but as with ANY THING there's obviously it's ups and downs.

There are the obvious perks of being a stay-at-home-mom (do I really fit in that category since I work at night? I'm not sure exactly what I'm considered...) such as spending ooddles of quality time with your little one - and the obvious down sides of minimal adult interaction and too much free time. But here are a few of the ups and downs I've found:


Favorite...

- Quality Jude time!!! (with out a doubt the best part! I just can't get enough of him!)
- Being able to make appointments for ANY time I want (everyone else is trying to get in before work, during lunch or after work)
- Not having to wake up and rush out the door (but there are plenty of mornings I wake up early)
- Not having to pay day care (even though things work out roughly the same, at least I'm not working certain hours to specifically pay for day care)
- Not having to pump regularly (I really did NOT like doing it regularly, but stuck through it for little man)
- Not having to work every day ('nuf said) and the ability to request more (or less hours) depending on present needs.

Not so favorite...

- Being off when everyone else is working (or working when everyone else is off - or not having a set schedule). So, you're either bored at one point or another or everyone's having fun without you.
- My new ability to want to spend money every day (when we don't always have it to spend). It's not easy when you're bored to want to walk through the mall, browse online, go grocery shopping (i grocery shop more now than ever), etc. It's easy to say you'll do other things, but even a fun trip to Milburn or a museum will cost you money to some degree.
- Not feeling like I 'contribute' enough (financially that is...)
- On the very rare occasion that Jude wakes up in the middle of the night or early in the morning, I am without a doubt the one to wake up with him (most of the time Ryan will wake up to get him out of the crib, but he then comes to me and I get him back to sleep). I know that he will eventually fall back asleep and I'll get my rest then. Being that Ryan has work I would feel 'bad' asking him to wake up instead.
- Feeling 'bad' if the house work doesn't get done. It's much easier to say "with working full time and a baby, things just get behind". Obviously I'm busy with Jude-Man, but I sometimes wonder why I can get SO behind if I'm home most of the day (see bullet number 2 in the 'not so favorite' section on what I'm doing the rest of the time). However, a day or two focusing on attacking little things around the house usually gets me right back on track.

Some people will tell you "being a mother is the hardest job there is". I personally think that's bull sh*t (but my son is only 4 months old and pretty well behaved in comparison to some of the horror stories we've heard - my opinion may change). I have enjoyed every minute of it and try to very rarely complain about anything. I think giving my little guy all the love, patience and attention he needs is one of the EASIEST things I have ever had to do.

I would however agree, that it's probably one of the most important things you can do. Whether you're home full time, part time, see your kids on weekend or every other week, every second spent with your child should be helping to shape them into stable, loving, intelligent and compassionate people. Without a doubt every moment spent with him or her will affect them to some degree in the future. So, it's not about quantity, it's quality.

But I'm all about wanting tons of both!!!

In conclusion, I love our current situation and look forward to him getting older and being able to teach him much more!